Elliot’s Birth Story - at home on October 1st, 2022

The Planning:

We always knew we wanted to have more than one child. I grew up with 2 siblings, Daniel grew up with 4 total. When Isla turned a year old we thought it would be a great time to start trying for another baby. I always had this vision in my head of having 2 under 2, I don’t know why but it was something I really liked the idea of. Starting out I knew it was going to take some time to conceive. I was still breastfeeding Isla for her nap and bedtime and I didn’t have my cycle back. I didn’t want to have to wean because I wanted it to be on her own terms so that was not in our cards. We tried for a few months with no luck. I joined different Facebook groups and tried different supplements and vitamins. Finally after 6 months of trying my cycle returned and we got pregnant our first try. Isla was 18 months at that point and still nursing to sleep at night. I was so relieved to have gotten pregnant on our own, but had to let go of the whole “2 under 2” vision, which was ultimately okay.

I already knew that I wanted have an entirely different birth experience than I did with Isla. Isla was born during the height of the pandemic in a hectic hospital setting and it ultimately just didn’t go the way I was hoping it would go. I plan to write more on that a different day. I wanted something different for this birth. I wanted to be able to be completely present and feel supported and comfortable throughout the whole experience. I’ve always had medical anxiety which makes going to the doctors and hospital more stressful than it should be. I did a lot of research and decided on having a home birth with a midwife.

I connected with Heather and Hilary from Loudoun Home Birth and knew right away that this was how I wanted to experience my next birth. We had our first meeting during my first trimester. We talked about my goals for my birth and we came up with a plan. They would come to my house for my prenatal appointments and we would set up in the living room or on the playroom couch so Isla could play. Most of the appointments consisted of the midwife checking in on me to see how was I feeling, what was going on in my life, and just everyday conversation. They would also listen to baby boy’s heartbeat and measure my belly. Isla always helped out with these things and it was so sweet to see how comfortable she was with the midwives and the entire process. Every one of my appointments were in the comfort of my own home. I didn’t have to worry about driving anywhere or having someone to watch Isla. It was the best and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. As my due date drew closer, we prepped our room and bathroom for the birth. I knew that I didn’t want to have a water birth but we had our large bathtub ready just in case I wanted to labor in the water. We had all of our supplies, snacks, essential oils, you name it, ready for Elliot’s arrival. Everything else was up to when he decided to make his appearance.

The day:

It was the morning of October 1st and we had woken up early to get Isla to ballet class. I didn’t get a good nights sleep due to having contractions the night before, but I had also spent the last 6 weeks having contractions virtually all day long so I didn’t think much of it. I was 2 days past my due date and mentally exhausted. Isla was born 3 weeks early so it was the most pregnant I had ever been and I was so sure he would be early like she was, so I was mentally and physically exhausted. Even with my contractions, I got up and started getting Isla ready for ballet class, and that’s when I knew I was in actual labor. My contractions were quickly getting more and more intense, to the point where I had to stop to work through them. I remember laying over the side of Isla’s bed with my head down and her laying her little 2 year old hand on my back saying “it’s okay mama, it’s okay”. Then with the next contraction she decided to hop on my back like I was a pony. Two year olds are something else! Luckily my midwife lived right now the road and was able to make it over pretty quickly.

We talked over a few things once she arrived. My mom was already at our house and my sister was on the way from college a few hours away. The plan was for my mom to be present during Elliot’s birth and my sister to watch Isla downstairs but things were progressing very quickly so my mom knew that she would likely have to watch Isla instead. I thought about having Isla present during Elliot’s birth but she was in the middle of a really sensitive and concerned stage and I honestly think she would have been scared and I really wanted to have a calm environment around me.

My contractions were still quite strong but I ended up going upstairs to my bedroom with Daniel to try to get some rest while my midwife and RN hung out downstairs to try to give us some space to nap. About an hour later I was in a ton of pain from my contractions. They were putting a ton of pressure on my lower back and I was getting no break in between them. The only way I could work through them was leaning over the side of our bed. My midwife came up to check in because she could hear that I was having a hard time. She applied some counter pressure to my back which helped during my contractions. I quickly got up from one side of the bed because I felt like I needed to use the bathroom when came a huge contraction which made me have to kneel down beside the bed right in front of the bathroom door because it was too painful to stand. Then that’s when I felt the sudden urge to push. Within a few minutes Elliot was born on our bedroom floor into the hands of my midwife with Daniel by my side.

After:

Our baby boy was finally here. We had skin to skin right away in the comfort of my own bed. Soon after, my mom brought Isla up to meet her little baby brother, she even got to cut his umbilical cord after some time had passed. Elliot was born so quickly his face was quite bruised but it wasn’t anything to be concerned about. After everything was cleaned up my midwife packed up and my mom stayed until Isla was in bed. But then there we were, ready to take on being parents of 2! My body felt so good. I truly couldn’t believe I had given birth just a few hours prior. I was able to get up and walk around (I stayed upstairs) and overall just felt strong, which was so different from Isla’s birth. My midwife continued to check in both in person and by calling and texting the next few weeks. We even had our amazing Chiropractor come to our house and give the entire family adjustments when Elliot was just two days old. The postpartum care and support made life with a newborn so much easier.

Elliot was and still is an absolute dream baby. He slept well, ate well, and is literally the sweetest and happiest baby I’ve ever met. I would relive my birth experience with Elliot over and over again if I could. I felt so empowered, in control, and at peace the entire time which was a huge difference than my first birth experience. There are certain memories about that day I’ll never forget, the crisp air and slight breeze, the way my mom cried when holding Elliot for the first time, how it felt to be curled up in bed with both my babies in my arms just hours after giving birth. It was truly a life changing experience.

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